Losing your virginity is pretty simple for boys, all they really have to do is aim. Going all the way is unique to everyone. While everyone has their own definition of what virginity is, losing it is accomplished the first time you have sex. For women, losing your virginity usually means voting your hymen off the island. When you go all the way, the hymen is sometimes torn or stretched, which might cause some discomfort.
Common tests and procedures
Common conditions
Everyone born with a vagina has a hymen, a collar of tissue at the entrance to your vagina. Just as all bodies are different, hymens are also different. Looking at a hymen does not tell you anything about virginity. Throughout history, patriarchal cultures have used the sexual history of girls and women to determine their status and value, as well as the status of their families and communities. It is wrongly assumed that by looking at the hymen you can prove whether a woman is a virgin. The hymen is a stretchy collar of tissue at the entrance to your vagina. It is protected by your labia. It can be compared to a scrunchie hair tie — with bunched-up tissue that expands when stretched eg, during sex or using tampons then returns to its bunched-up shape afterwards. Hymens come in many different shapes and sizes. They may have a ring shape, half-moon shape or squiggly edges with notches — all of these are normal.
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The hymen is the stuff of legend and lore in many cultures, the treasured prize a woman gives her husband on their wedding night. People often do not know what it looks like or what really happens to it when virginity is lost. For example, some of my teen patients have questions about a partner male or female inserting a finger into a vagina. If a girl uses a tampon does that cause her to lose her virginity? If she falls off her bike, might that affect her hymen, and thus her virginity?
